the day after the revolution

i'm listening to the my bloody valentine show right now. i am also wondering what's supposed to happen now? this also came about more from reading the mbv forum, which i am chronic lurker on. it seems that the majority of the people that post there are in their early twenties- they have stories of telling their peers that they are into my bloody valentine and getting responses confusing them with my chemical romance and mentions of a good charlotte song. i've never heard my chemical romance or that good charlotte song. i've only heard a few good charlotte songs. i don't even think that i'd be able to even remember what it sounds like it made so little of an impression on me.
the recording ball is rolling again bigtime. 'dandelions' is nearly done. the strings will be done very soon- just two parts that i need to have billy do in october. i realised today that the recording trip coincides with jolie holland playing at the lakeshore theater. stefanie put things into perspective- i've seen her three times already. she will also come back- she tours a lot. she came through chicago three times in support of 'springtime will kill you.' it still kind of sucks because the new record is so good and i'm anxious to see her play those songs. she played a generous chunk of the album last time she came through- 'mexico city,' 'corrido por buddy,' 'palmyra' and possibly a few others. i'm still not real familiar with the tracklist. i like the weepers the best- 'fox in its hole', her version of 'henry lee' is gorgeous and 'sweet loving man.'
but, unfortunately i do need to go home and do these recordings if i want to maintain some kind of illusion that the record can be done by the end of the year. we're getting stuff started for the next record as well. i might still try to buy some new microphones for the recording of the 'all hope is blind' album even though i've already started the tracks. a little bump up in fidelity would probably be nice. it doesn't have to be huge, but i think that i've reached the zenith of what i'm capable of with what i have and there are things i'd like to experiment with. plus it would be leading up to the day somewhere in the distance a few years from now when i actually have a 16-track studio going.
not much else has been going on in the personal life. i think i might actually be somewhat happy. i haven't had any bouts of depression or anything for a while- which is nice. i hadn't even really noticed. the closest i've come to that is while i was recording with chris i was listening to the playback for 'sleep now...' and how beautiful the strings sounded and it suddenly made me feel incredibly heartbroken to know that in all likelihood once the song was released into the ether how it would be swallowed up and largely ignored and that just made my heart feel just the slightest bit heavy. i just never thought that i'd be capable of writing competent string parts on my own and i always thought that the quality would suffer a bit since i don't really know what i'm doing but so far that has not proven to be true. not even a little bit. it actually turns out that my hard work in that department pays off- it's another department where i have an ability that i didn't think i had. i don't mean to pat myself on the back so unabashedly, i don't think anyone is more surprised than me when i hear how these string parts turn out. it is just beginning to dawn on me that this is not something everyone can figure out how to do. if i wanted to persist in this department i'd imagine that i could probably figure out how to score for an orchestra eventually way way in the future. probably not though since i don't have access to one, so there wouldn't be much of a reason to. i'm just so proud of how i've been able to accomplish and capture this aspect of my music because it's become an extremely invaluable one.
the strings show isn't going to happen this year. i'm setting my sights on the spring for that one now. i think that we're done trawling for shows for the year. i'm going to go for an acoustic show at home. i'd like to play with multiple players, but i'm not sure i know any- i might be able to find a few through friends of friends, but it's nowhere near the extent to which i know people who play here.
we are going to be featured on a blog called rcdlbl which is associated with the folks at the empty bottle somehow. a woman randomly emailed me asking for permission to feature us and post some of our tracks as mp3s. that's a good thing. it's beginning to fascinate me where these discs that get sent out end up. this is the first time we've sent things out, someone has found them, listened to them and liked them enough to pull them from a slush pile that no one listens to and do something unexpected with them on their own. the first 'down to sleep' review resulted from my having sent the album to the radio station in lawrence before our show at the record bar. someone who worked at the station just sort of nabbed it and then wrote us a really nice review. it's nice when that happens. it feels like people are randomly stumbling across us occasionally as well.
tonight is the night of sam and ben's wedding. that will be quite fun. i'm a bit nervous because my old boss will be there, but stefanie has assured me that she wouldn't directly confront me in a social setting like that which has proven to be true so far. she comes in to where i work now occasionally- only a handful of times in nine months (wow- long time). so i guess my policy will be not to worry about it and have a good time tonight. in case you need a little backstory i quit working for this woman via answering machine with absolutely no previous notice right after my review. it's a long, ridiculous story but mainly i think it boils down to someone who doesn't make even a small effort most of the time to treat people (namely her employees) with even a shred of common decency. she's been doing it and getting away with it for so long that she somehow is able to maintain the illusion that people don't mind it until little outbursts occur and she acts baffled like she doesn't understand why someone would want to quit suddenly after being treated like a second class citizen and being picked on for over a year and half for making mistakes that everyone else there makes.
i've now written about three paragraphs i've deleted. i should just let it lay i guess. it was kind of a traumatic experience that i still grapple with occasionally. it's amazing how you can meet people in your life that are such a steam-rolling force of negativity that it almost hijacks your own thoughts and emotions from you. unfortunately i've been one of these forces before. i'm grateful that i was able to recognise the problem and turn it around. it was a bit of a painful experience, but in the end i'm glad i was humble enough and smart enough to recognise it, admit it and be honest enough with myself to know that it was up to me to do something about it and then to succeed. i haven't had a lot of experience like that- i'm usually more the champion of the self-defeatist attitude. most people i've met with this problem aren't secure enough to admit to even themselves that they have a problem at all.
on to other things-
so much new and awesome music. i've bought two old bardo pond lps. i'm loving bardo pond so much lately. i got 'lapsed' and 'set and setting.' there was more stuff at amoeba that i kind of wish i'd bought. some stuff i'd never found anywhere else and didn't even know was released. the new jolie holland is really good, of course. i like it better than 'springtime can kill you' but 'escondida' is still my favourite record of hers. i'm still waiting on the vivian girls self-titled lp to come in the mail. it's been delayed again unforunately, so it'll be another week or two before i get it. i have 9 of the 10 songs on my ipod at the moment so i've listened to it a fair amount and i fucking love it. so beautiful. i hope they come through again soon- of course they've already been through about three times in the last year or two. i've missed all three of course- two were while we were out of town. i'd like to see the black angels play again. i think that i'd really like it if i saw them again. i'm always in the mood to see the warlocks play live. there is a giant question mark dangling over whether the brian jonestown massacre will ever play here again- it doesn't look good. he actually seems to be sticking to his claim that they would only tour europe now since all of their equipment got stolen.